That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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