Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
