Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
