let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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