I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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