he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
