Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
