He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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