do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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