In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
