we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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