please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
