Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Randomize
