Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize