THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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