Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize
