Joe is yelling at the trees again.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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