thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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