i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Randomize
