The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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