Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
