We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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