It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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