i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
