im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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