he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
