Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Randomize
