third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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