Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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