last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
