I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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