we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize