i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
