my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
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