Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
