If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize