is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
