I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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