you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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