Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm experimenting with sincerity
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize