if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
