Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
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