i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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