I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
