There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
This is the high leading the old right now
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
