you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
