When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
