Kareoke will never be a sober sport
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
