Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
