just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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